A Story of Recovery:

By age 19, I could no longer ignore my frightening loss of control


Me, a food addict? Are you kidding? If you had told me just five years ago that I would soon be addicted to food just like an alcoholic is to alcohol, I would have thought at the very least you had a few screws loose. First of all, I wasn’t fat! Far from it, I was a skinny teenager and had even tried to gain weight for several years. How could someone like me be a food addict?

By the age 19, I could no longer ignore my frightening loss of control over my eating. Why did I eat so much that I was sick and bloated, often stealing other people’s food and eating in secret? My eating habits had always been a bit strange, but now I was out of control. Day after day I would repeat this desperate behavior. I could not seem to control myself. As my binge eating and isolation got worse, so did the depression I’d been struggling with throughout my adolescence.

No matter what I tried – youth-empowerment workshops, therapy, anti-depressant drugs, health food, meditation (to name a few) – I had always slipped back into hopelessness, depression, and uncontrollable eating. It was getting harder and harder to take care of myself and to show up for work.

I was scared and miserable when I walked into my first FA meeting, but that first meeting gave me hope.

I learned that food addiction is a life-threatening illness just like alcoholism; and that there is a solution.

Coming to FA at 19 years old, I know I have been spared decades of the hell that I hear about in older members’ stories. I no longer eat to blog out an unbearable existence. I have a wonderful, simple life; and I look forward to each new day.

One day at a time, FA gives me freedom from the insanity I used to live in and the chance to live a normal life. I know in my heart that FA has saved my life.

 

This story was originally published in the Connection Magazine. Subscribe to the Connection Magazine for more stories of recovery. Or submit your own story of recovery.