To get the real joy of the program, you need to give away what you have learned and experienced. You can pray to your higher power to send you people to talk to about this program. When I came to FA, I was desperate, sick, and very discouraged about the way my life was going. In the previous four years, I had gained 50 pounds and was up to 295. I prayed a simple, desperate prayer to God for help. Through my hobby of old cars, I unknowingly met an FA member. He saw my distress and told me about FA. I started immediately. By the first weigh-in, I’d already lost 10 pounds and I was elated. I knew I had the answer to my desperate prayer and was going in the right direction. I felt like hitting the streets as an FA evangelist. (I soon forgot that idea, after... Continue Reading
I grew up in a pretty strict household, where food was accounted for. I learned early on to sneak food. My father had a strong work ethic and instilled it in me. By 15, I had a part-time job to pay for my school supplies, clothes, and many other expenses. I was very active in my church and high school sports. I became a Boy Scout Eagle Scout, and had a full-time girlfriend. By 18, my father and stepmother asked me to leave my home, and I set out to find my way in the world with not a penny in my pocket or any idea how to manage my life. I was bitter and pissed and felt that God and my family had abandoned me. But I told myself I was going to make it in spite of it all. Nearly a decade prior to coming into Program, I... Continue Reading
Ten years ago, I reached a point where I almost gave up ever being able to control my weight. I had struggled with various diets for more than 50 years. I was about ready to say to hell with it and eat what I wanted, when I wanted it. If it killed me, so be it. (My doctor had assured me that it would kill me if I continued on the path I was on.) I had become so nasty, mean, and ugly that I couldn’t stand myself. I was continually angry with myself for failing the diet plans that I had started almost every Monday morning of my life. I was on many prescriptions, which only exacerbated my “don’t give a damn” outlook on life. I had dieted and exercised my way up to 452 pounds. My nephew, who was a surgeon in the Air Force, came home from Germany, took one look at me, and suggested that... Continue Reading
Of all the tools of the program, making phone calls is the hardest for me. I am virtually phone phobic. Email works fine for me to get in touch with my grown children, but I don’t even do well talking on the phone with them. They forgive me for that. Only once before did I phone before taking a bite…until this week. I have been in Program for two years and have been abstinent for more than 21 months. I came into FA an atheist—a devoted, committed, lifelong atheist. I had been an atheist for 50 of my 84 years. That has been changing in my life, especially through my 16 months in an AWOL(A Way of Life, a study of the Twelve Steps), where I have been studying the Twelve Steps. It has been hard for me to give up my “faith” after all those years of comfort in... Continue Reading
Before I came into FA, I did service and performed many acts of kindness. But I find that service in recovery is different. For me now, doing service comes from a deep desire to arrest my own suffering, and to help others with God’s wonderful gift. I feel good when someone else finds the freedom I have found. It is not important that I like doing the service, but rather whether it gives someone else the opportunity to share the joy I have found. Learning to do FA service and do things I ordinarily don’t like to do was an acquired taste for me. Service has become an expression of my recovery, but it is also has been a route to getting there. I remember my early days in program 16 years ago. My sponsor and old timers had to teach me to love and do service. “Could you stop... Continue Reading
