Posts about Recovery

Waiting for an Open Door

Unemployed, but abstinent, I had been looking for a job for over 18 months. I showed up to countless interviews, job workshops, networking events and more. I was reminded by this program to stay in action each day to keep my mind from going into any sort of despair about my future. On days where there was simply no action to take, I felt as though God was silent to my endless prayers, but my dear fellows and sponsor kept reminding me the goodness of my Higher Power and that I was being gifted with clean abstinence throughout the whole journey. One of my FA fellows kept telling me that I just needed to kiss a lot of frogs before finding the right job. Job searching was truly just like dating. I showed up to several promising looking job opportunities that seemed so perfect for me, yet I didn’t get... Continue Reading

 


 

Never Immune

After three-and-a-half years of back-to-back abstinence, I figured I had arrived. Five sponsees, leadership roles in my area intergroup, service positions at committed meetings, a general willingness to share pretty much everything with my sponsor—I was willing, able, and pink-clouding like mad. I’d learned how to enjoy family gatherings, cope responsibly at work, become financially responsible, and was even starting to explore the treasures on a dating website. These, I thought, were the promises of the program I’d been told to expect. I’d started dating a delightful man who was easy, intelligent, active, and funny. He was long-separated from his wife, still close with his college-aged daughter, and respectful of them both. No debts, financially prudent, and socially conscious—all the boxes were ticked. His sailing buddy had invited us both to the family Seder. We’d been told to expect an eclectic gathering of old family friends, union activists, a civil rights lawyer, a mother and daughter who were running the Boston Marathon, a Peruvian professor, and... Continue Reading

 


 

Open Minded and Now Open Hearted 

I’ve been in FA in England for 9 years and often speak with members from America and overseas, yet never had the opportunity to visit them or attend any of the FA conventions so I was naïve and dismissive as to what they were or how they might apply to me. In 2018, however, I managed to save the money and finally go – I flew to New England a week before the Business Convention, visiting fellows who happily gave me places to stay, abstinent food to eat and drove me here, there and everywhere. During that week, I qualified at two meetings and talked with many fellows, including some newcomers. It struck me how it doesn’t matter where in the world we are; the meeting format and the identification we all have with each other as food addicts is exactly the same. It gave me a warm glow inside of renewed belonging. On the... Continue Reading

 


 

Trusting My Higher Power

About seven months ago, I called to check in on my social security benefits. They were the sum total of my income, and I was getting some indications that there was an issue. The fact that I called to determine the status of my benefits is a direct result of being in FA. Prior to entering this amazing program, I let most things slide, which generally didn’t help my situation. For example, I remember receiving a summons to appear in court prior to FA. I didn’t go because it seemed scary. As a result, my disability benefits were suspended because of my failure to appear in court. Thankfully, FA is teaching me to show up for life events, even if they are uncomfortable. After making several FA phone calls, my courage was such that I could call Social Security. Even though it was not my favorite way to spend a Monday morning, FA... Continue Reading

 


 

Isolating But Never Alone

Despite my initial trepidation about staying home during the COVID-19 pandemic, sheltering with my husband and my adult children has been a relatively stress-free experience. My prescient first reaction—“I can’t stay home I need to get out or I will go crazy”—turned out to be wrong. I get up in the morning, take my sponsee calls, do quiet time, read, eat breakfast, and exercise. My husband (also a member of Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous) and I work from home on our respective computers set up in different rooms of the house. I’m amazed by what I can accomplish during the day. My husband and I sometimes meet for lunch and always have dinner together, our version of date night. With their unusual schedule—in bed at 5 a.m. and up by 3 p.m., near the end of the work day—our children stay out of our way. After dinner we all go for walks, play games, watch movies, talk or clean. I find myself calmer and taking care of myself more. Then it began! My kids started baking every other day or so. They bake something new or repeat something they love. The aroma is hard to escape. It triggers a mental binge about sweets. I start playing this game in my head. Should I? Why not? No one is watching. No one... Continue Reading