A Story of Recovery:

Keeping an Open Mind

Before FA, my life was in shambles. I was obese and could not stop eating. I wasn’t showering more than twice a week, and when I did, it was only after plenty of harassment from my family. I thought it was perfectly acceptable to have food stains on my clothes, and I was picking the clothes I would wear for the day from the dirty laundry hamper. It was clear that I didn’t have a clue as to how to make things better. This eventually led to a great willingness to work the FA program. I diligently used all the tools every day. And it worked. I have been abstinent for a little over 4 years.

There were times, however, when my doubt and negative thinking got the best of me. When someone said (referring to the old binge foods), “Thank you, God, that’s not my food,” I would think to myself, “What are you talking about!  I’m not grateful! I only have to reach over and grab it and it will be my food! How is FA helping?” Or, when someone said,  “One day at a time,” I would think to myself, “I’m not stupid! I know this is really for the rest of my life!”

But in my outreach calls, I kept hearing people with long-term abstinence endorse those phrases and slogans. When I decided to try them out, I found that all I needed was that little bit of willingness — and they started to work for me too. I can’t explain exactly how it happened, but somehow they did bring relief. I’ve learned that there is always room for improvement in my program, that sometimes even small suggestions are offered for a good reason, and that keeping an open mind can make all the difference.