My father-in-law has six siblings. He and another sibling are in AA, and the rest are active alcoholics. He has a sister who is morbidly obese. His sister hasn’t left the house all summer, since she’s becoming more and more immobile and her panic attacks are increasing daily. During our visit, the siblings had a meeting to discuss and plan an intervention for the sister. They weren’t planning an addiction intervention (since the active addicts don’t believe in addiction), but a medical intervention that would involve a rehab. I happened to be in the room when the actual intervention was taking place with some of the family. But, since I knew that the siblings don’t recognize food addiction, I was reluctant to open my mouth because I’ve only been part of the family for five years and I didn’t want to overstep my bounds. My heart broke, seeing my wife’s... Continue Reading
I had been in FA for almost two years, and I was struggling with what to do next. The weight was off. Now what was I to do with myself? I was still wandering through grocery stores reading labels, trying to find something different to fill the hole in me. I was in a store every other day and was finding myself going out to eat more often, having lunches with co-workers during the week, and going out to meals with my husband on the weekends. One of my favorite things to do before I found FA was to go out to eat. I would try to talk my husband into going shopping so I could eat out. I would start thinking on Thursday about were could we go so I can get the largest portions and bring leftovers home. My mind was always planning. Eating out in abstinence was... Continue Reading
Another diet stopped working It never occurred to me that I ate for any other reason aside from loving food. I loved the taste, the texture, the look, the smell, and especially the quantities. I was a skinny kid, but I started using food as a drug after I was molested at age 16. I went to my first Weight Watcher’s meeting at age 17, with ten pounds to lose. After 30 years of yo-yo dieting, I was 60 pounds overweight when I found my way into Overeaters Anonymous (OA). I joined 90-Day OA (the precursor to FA). I felt right at home the first time I heard someone share about what flour and sugar did to them. I identified with all the feelings they were describing. Prior to this, I never was able to express what I was feeling. All I could do was to either react, or check... Continue Reading
When I came into FA in Feb 2007, I was 205 pounds. I didn’t have any “family drama” because I had moved far away from my family. What I didn’t realize was that the drama still existed in my mind and in my heart. Until I could make peace with my family members and accept them for what they were, I would continue to eat. I grew up in a house where I was told all sorts of things about my weight and appearance. I was told that I was big-boned and curvy, and that I had fat people on both sides of the family. I was told that I was always going to have to watch every single thing I put into my mouth, that our family doesn’t have fast metabolisms, and that I would never look like one of those skinny toothpick girls. I was the oldest of... Continue Reading
As soon as my twin baby girls were big enough to eat bite-sized food with their fingers, but before they could talk, they developed that peculiar toddler tendency of urgently thrusting food up to my mouth and offering to feed it to me. My refrains of, “No, you eat it,” and, “No thank you,” were starting to wear thin. I was in danger of feeling sorry for myself for continually having to rebuff their adorable, well-meaning efforts to share food with me and connect in that way. One day God graced me with a solution that completely reframed the meaning of their gesture. Now, when they hold their food up to me with an expectant look, instead of assuming they’re saying, “Mommy, do you want to eat this?” I assume they’re saying, “Mommy, what’s this called?” I joyfully name that food. How do they respond? They pop it into their... Continue Reading
