One recent Sunday, I hung my washing outside in our lovely South African sun to dry. When it was time to take my washing down, I noticed some of my items had dirt and mud stains on them. At first I was puzzled and wondered how it had happened. Then I heard my neighbor’s small children playing next to the fence. It struck me they must have made some mud clay tossed it across the fence, and hit my laundry on the line. My first thought was to tell my neighbor what his children had done and explain that this was unacceptable. Then all of a sudden a gentle feeling came over me, and I remembered how, as a child, I had also played in the mud. I was innocent as a child, never deliberately wanting to hurt anyone. Before I came through the doors of FA, my life was... Continue Reading
I had been abstinent for sixty days in FA when my beloved younger brother was diagnosed with lymphoma. He hadn’t been to see a doctor in twenty years, so we worried and stewed and fretted. He lived in another city, so with my sponsor’s help, I planned how to be with him during the tests and diagnoses while still honoring my abstinence. I’d made a commitment to this way of life and was reaping benefits I didn’t want to lose: a mind clear from food fog, emotions free of self-loathing and confusion, and a new focus that helped me fulfill my responsibilities. Where before my life had been dominated by thoughts of food or handling food or eating food, I was now savoring a life of boating, family get-togethers, peace, and glimpses of joy and freedom, along with a newfound writing practice. I knew I was powerless over these circumstances... Continue Reading
I joined FA seven months ago. When I listened to others share their stories at my meetings, I knew I was at the right place, at long last. I battled with yoyo dieting for a long time, until I thought that perhaps I should go quietly into the sunset of my 77 years and accept what is. Then, out of the blue I found FA! I was not even looking for another solution. But then, a fellow “Exercise Club Member” of days gone by happened to cross my path. She looked better than ever before. I almost did not recognize her. I stood there with my mouth wide open, as she told me about FA and invited me to come to a meeting with her. My reply was, “I will come. But first, I want to get Easter Sunday over and done with.” That Easter was (hopefully) my last binge. ... Continue Reading
I’ve been married for 14 years to the kindest, sweetest, funniest guy on the planet. I was born under the Chinese astrological year of the ox … steadfast, loyal, steady, stubborn, obstinate He’s a Rabbit… sensitive, intuitive, energetic. I adore him. But, before program, I spent a lot of time feeling critical of him. “Somebody needs to whip him into shape.” I thought. Before program I would agonize inside my own head about how best to deliver the messages to him, to “fix him,” “improve him.” I used to yell at him, “I turned myself into a pretzel for you and what have you ever done for me?” And then, I would eat, to still the inner demons in my head, to reward myself for “putting up” with him, to do something for myself. The food stopped working. I isolated. In program, my sponsor guided me to WAIT: to ask... Continue Reading
Right now I am using my program to stop obsessing about skinny jeans. And for all you newcomers, yep, working the FA program makes a person skinny. But then what do I do with a mind that wants to obsess on getting more and more and more pairs of skinny jeans? It is just like with the food; my brain lies and says that if I get xyz then I will feel peaceful and satisfied. Not true! God brings peace and in God’s time. So, I think writing for the connection will probably get me closer to God than giving in to my jeans craziness. I have been back for a couple of weeks from visiting my parents in Oregon. I had not been back to the place where I grew up and lived for about 15 years. I saw no reason for going back. It never occurred to me.... Continue Reading
