A Story of Recovery:

Positive Thinking

One thing that is important to me in my recovery from Food Addiction in FA is that I stay ‘in love’ with our program. Negative thinking, fault finding, murmuring about the tools, not only does not put my program first and support my growth, it can also lead to me to leave the program that is saving my life. My top weight was 233 pounds. Today I weigh 136 on a 5’8” frame. The longer I have the grace to stay in program and take the right actions to stay abstinent, the better and better my life keeps getting.

So, why in the world do I even worry about ‘loving’ this program?   Because I am an addict who uses food as a drug. And like all good addicts, I want what I want, when I want it, the way I want it. Program interferes with this and my addict loves nothing more than leading me away from my recovery.  Each time I take a half measure, or gossip, or try to change FA, or make excuses, or don’t do my tools, or isolate, I encourage my disease.   Such actions have taken me out of program two times in six years.

Solidly loving this program of FA means, to me, respecting the simple disciplines that have been handed down, doing every tool, every day, not analyzing or criticizing the program, enjoying it, speaking positively about it, staying abstinent, and being an encouragement to others.

I wish I could take credit for this idea but it was my husband’s not mine.  After leaving the program only to realize a year later I needed and wanted to return, my husband looked at me and told me if I came back to FA I would need to really love the program this time.  I have and it helps.

 

This story was originally published in the Connection Magazine. Subscribe to the Connection Magazine for more stories of recovery. Or submit your own story of recovery.