I prayed for many years for a way out of the prison and cycle of misery I was in. For someone who has battled food and diet obsession all of her life, it is unimaginable that I would find myself in a right-sized body, maintaining a 111 pound weight loss for almost two years. Thank God for a misery and desperation level that brought me into FA, willing and ready to go to any lengths to not only achieve abstinence, but recovery. I am so thankful to have finally found the solution to a major problem. How did I get there? The first thing I did was to find a sponsor who had what I wanted. It was so helpful to find a sponsor who kept the focus on me. I was a huge caretaker, always taking care of everyone else, but myself. I was blessed to find a sponsor... Continue Reading
I was 24, and I had struggled with bulimia, drugs, and alcohol for over 10 years. I left home at 14 and moved to a big city to live with my sister. I instantly gravitated to the darker side of life. I spent more time partying than studying. I couldn’t focus in school, and my food addiction led to drug use and daily bingeing and purging. I increasingly became more rageful, angry, and negative as my disease progressed. My diagnosed depression had led to my using anti-depressants at age 16. After graduating from college, the party was finally over. I had recently split my pants while bowling, and I officially felt fat. The bulimia stopped working, and every weekend I looked forward to escaping by smoking pot and getting drunk. I was in financial debt and felt like my world was slowly caving in. I was negative, depressed, and purposeless.... Continue Reading
I have experienced a 160-pound weight loss in FA. I have come to believe that “practicing these principles in all my affairs” is an effective way to address the many other addictions in my life. As a recovering chronic spender and credit card abuser, I now live each month on a balanced and reasonable budget. Knowing exactly how much money I can spend for food has brought tremendous peace to my life. This past week I had $44.00 left in my budget for food and over a week to go before another paycheck. As I shopped the aisles, I looked at each item from the “do I need this or do I want this?” perspective. I didn’t do any mental math manipulation. I simply asked God to help me discern what I really needed. I stood at the checkout and watched the total rise. As the clerk neared the end... Continue Reading
I had months of all-day sickness and a strong aversion to my abstinent meals when I was pregnant with my second child. I never thought it would end with my baby dying due to a sudden placenta abruption ten days before my due date. I never thought I would deliver him eight hours after he was pronounced dead. I never thought I could ever stay abstinent through something so heart wrenching. But I did. How did I do it? I did it with the help of my sponsor, who showed up for me in ways I have never seen anyone show up for another person. Among many other things, she listened to my intense grief for months, comforted me, and reminded me that I had been through a traumatic experience. She helped me walk through (and overcome) resentments toward the medical staff that sent me home with symptoms two hours... Continue Reading
Addiction is an ugly word. Learning I had a food addiction was like getting a life sentence with no chance for parole. But I came to FA resigned to the fact that since nothing else worked for me, I needed to work this program. I have found that FA has given me a chance to live in a healthy body for the rest of my life. FA allows me to have healthy, filling, nutritious, delicious meals. FA encourages me to be grateful for what I have and to avoid the abyss of self-pity. I admit that being in a right-size body is surprisingly scary. I need to talk to people with long-term abstinence to help me accept the new me. I have seen FA members who insist on sticking to their own ideas. For instance, many people have a hard time letting go of what they think they should weigh. I’ve seen... Continue Reading
